Sunday, June 21, 2009

A Father's Day Fairy Tale

Once upon a time in a far away land on the night of April 28 a little boy was born. On that same night something strange happened, a semi carrying goats crashed and all the goats got away. One curious and magical goat snuck into the nearby hospital and made his way into the little boys room. He walked over to the little babies bed and whispered a spell in his ear. He told the little boy that if he would lead a good and service filled life, he would receive super human magical powers.
As the little boy grew he remembered what the goat had told him and always tried to do what was right. When the little boy grew into a man he married the most beautiful maiden in the land. He went to the goat to tell him thank you for his beautiful wife and the goat said " My boy if you continue to do what is right I will give you exceptional brain power, and you will go on to be a great Accountant" The man thought this sounded too good to be true, an accountant?!That would be magical. The man and the beautiful woman went on to have two sons, one with the coloring of the man and one with the coloring of the maiden. And they were happy, for a while, but soon the man started to feel a sadness and a void in his heart, so he went to see the goat and said "Goat, I have done what is right, I have been kind and giving, but I feel my life won't be complete until I have a beautiful daughter" and the goat replied " My boy, you have been good and kind and if you continue I will give you a daughter"
Nine months later the maiden gave birth to a baby girl, not just any baby girl, THE MOST BEAUTIFUL baby girl that anyone in all the land had ever seen! People came from long and far came to see this blonde haired blue eyed beauty. Now the man felt the goat had gone above and beyond , so he went to thank the goat and vowed that he would dedicate his life to service in honor of the goat's kindness.
" In return" said the goat "I will give you magical powers to help you, your first power is a charming smile, so everyone who meets you will like you! I will give you the power to be a hard worker and the knowledge of manual labor so you can do things like lay tile, put down hard wood floors and pour cement for driveways! I will also give you a good strong business mind so you can do something like.....own and operate a laundromat"
And the man went and did many great things to the honor the goat for giving him such a beautiful and wonderful daughter. He started a youth soccer program in an Appalacian town. He invited 2 young men into his home every Sunday for dinner who were also from a far away land. He started working as an accountant for a company who helps and protects the elderly.
All the super powers the goat gave him came in handy. Everyone he ever met liked him due to the charming smile. He was able to lay tile and pour cement for the driveway in his new home and in the homes of many of his friends. He even bought his very own laundromat!
He went back to the goat to pay his respects and the goat replied " My boy, I am pleased with you, you have done very good! I will now give you more magical gifts! My first is selective hearing, this will protect you from hearing things you don't want to hear. I will also give you the gift of great leadership and superior popcorn making skills"
And the man went on and did many great things. He gave a less fortunate family a car, and dressed up as Santa and delivered presents to children who had none. He became the bishop of his church, and mastered the art of popcorn making, which he practiced every Sunday. He also mastered his selective hearing, which got him out of many chores that would waste his precious time, and assignments at work!
Years went by and the man's oldest son got married and they were expecting twins. The man and maiden were extatic but the man had a few life altering questions he needed to ask the goat.
"Goat" he asked "what shall my grandchildren call me and my beautiful maiden?"
"Good question my boy, you and your maiden need a special name to set you apart from all the other grandparents. And they shall call you, Gangy and PopPop!" the goat said, rather proud of himself
"No!" shouted the man "We need to be taken seriously, this is what we will be known as for generations!"
" Fine, the names you shall be known as are Nana and Papa! And for all the good you have done I will give you one final magical power, you will the worlds best dad and Papa!" The man was satisfied and thanked the goat for his insight and new magical power and he went home to live his service filled life.
And the goats last power came true! He was the worlds best dad and Papa! A few years later the man heard that the goat had died. He went to the grave of the goat and found a note for him, written on the front said " My final request for you"
The man vowed that he would do what ever the goat requested was for he had given him so much his entire life, he opened up the envelope and it said

" My boy I have one final request from you and if you do this everything you wish for in life will be yours.......In your will.....leave everything to the best thing I ever gave you..your beautiful daughter!"
And he did , and he lived happily ever after!

Some of the events in this story have been dramatized, they do however answer soo many questions about how my dad became so super human! I love you dad! Happy Fathers day!


  1. wow! the goat forgot to mention that his only daughter would have drug problems. i'm so relieved that you got the will, because it clearly states that the benefactor will be doing all the diaper changing and care-taking.

  2. Yea that's just what he told you to make you feel better

  3. what a great story. You are so unbelievable. I wish I had an imagination like that. You should write a book.